Wednesday, December 31, 2008

What I learned in 2008!

Woohoo! 2008 is almost over! I've learned a great many things from this year. Let me share with you:

1) Never go on a cruise with your husband.
While I have never been on a cruise, they do seem so appealing to me. The dancing, the buffets, the cute little cabins, the booze, becoming bffs with everyone on the ship. However, I should probably never go with my future husband, because he might throw me overboard and then blame it on "my depression." It's just the perfect scene for a crime, and look, let's face it: I talk a lot. So just say I'm on a romantic cruise for my honeymoon, and I keep making my new hubby act out Jeff Van Vonderen's speech on Intervention ("I've got a bunch of people in this room who love you like crazy, and they don't want to lose you.") Hr might be all, Liz, no more! And then push me overboard. That would really suck, especially since I would have gotten all new presents for my wedding.

2) I should probably start Internet dating.

Ugh, I hate to admit it, but in 2009 I will turn 30 and I do not want to be a New York City cliche with my Lean Cuisines in the fridge. I also have my sister's wedding in November and I can't be having everyone ask where the future Mr. Simons is. So I have to be proactive. Plus I will get lots of free food at all those restaurants to which my Internet dates will take me.

3) Free food rules!

Just saying.

And a quick recap of yesterday and today's free food. Yesterday my dear friend took me out to the Grog in Newburyport for lunch. I ate a side salad, butternut squash raviolis, garlic bread, and an Ipswich ale.

Today I ate a can of soup at my parents' house.

Love you all! Here's to a happy and healthy 2009!

Your pal,


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