Expanding your wallet while expanding your waistline!
Friday, October 24, 2008
It's Friday night and I am watching cable and writing about free food!
Today was a "meh" day in the hunt for free food. Last night I had bought Johnny K some Butterfingers and Nestle chocolate bars (the ones in the red wrappers, not Crunches) for his candy stash, so I had to make sure I didn't eat those today because they wouldn't count towards my free food quota. So instead I ate a Reese's Caramel Peanut Butter cup, which is good in theory but melts and is very messy so a bit annoying to eat at work because it gets your keyboard all sticky. My co-worker Jim also gave me a piece of dark chocolate which was cool. Thanks Jim!
I went to the gym again today, woohoo! If I'm going to eat all this free food, I might as well do something to keep the junk in the trunk at bay. I love my gym because I can look like a lesbian gym teacher and it's okay, because I go to the gym in Chelsea and none of the cute boys are checking me out, you know what I mean? Not that there is anything wrong with looking like a lesbian gym teacher or even being one, but as a heterosexual girl approaching 30 in 9 and a half months, I want to emit sexy-come-hither vibes to potential mates, not I-will-beat-you-in-touch-football vibes. Just saying.
After the gym, I went home on the subway. I stopped at Key Foods to pick up some chocolate chips because I have to bake cookies for my children's lit book club that meets on Sunday. At this point, I still looked like a lesbian gym teacher, which would have been fine but there were some totally hot young firefighters in the market, and they didn't want to put out this fire, if you know what I mean. Note to self--always look hot when going into Key Foods.
Liz Simons is a New York City-based comedian who has performed all over the city at top clubs including Carolines, Gotham, and Broadway Comedy Club. She has been a featured performer in the show Mortified in New York and Boston. She is adorable, single, and likes to eat. She started this blog because she was known as the girl at her office who was always the first person to know about the leftover food from meetings. And how she loved that free food! She took that passion and now writes about her daily selection of free food.