Thursday, April 2, 2009

If I were on Tough Love, Stephen would probably tell me no more free food!

Ugh, it happened. I just became addicted to a new VH1 show, Tough Love. Why? Why??? I shake my fist at You, God!!!

Tough Love is a very deep show featuring a (single) 28-year-old male matchmaker named Stephen Ward who took 8 insecure females ranging in age from 22 to 38 and is putting them through dating boot camp. He's kind of douchey yet the show is oddly compelling. Basically, I'm 1 and a half episodes in and I have found out exactly why I am single: I need to look really really hot at all times. To get that way, I need to work out all the time and be charming, not snarky (uh oh) and listen with rapt attention to everything a man says. Yikes.

I'm simplifying things, of course, but if I gave a toot I would be horrified and cry in my sleep. But, I just don't care! What's the point? The man who is lucky enough to find me will be receiving a very rare jewel. Woohoo!

And if I am lucky, he will provide me with a lot of free food! That's all this girl Liz needs!

Take today for example! There was an informational lunch meeting with an exec from a different branch from the company, and there was pizza! And soda! I ate 1 slice of cheese, 1 slice of pepperoni, and 1 Diet Coke. After the meeting, I took 2 more slices and two leftover sodas for tomorrow. I'm always thinking ahead!

Now, let me go on a date, hehe! Paging Stephen Ward!

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